Swine Flu who knew?

So I don't know what it's like anywhere else but yesterday when I went to the Dr. I was asked specifically (just like the 4 people previous to me) "do you have a cough or fever" I was being seen for a persistent cough so I was honest and said YES I have a cough.. I was handed a mask and asked that if I cough to please put on the mask but if I wasn't coughing I didn't need to.. I haven't been coughing as long as I have a cough drop in my mouth so I sat away from the population of people (just in case heaven forbid I cough) and started to read my magazine.. got called in to the office they took my temp. and low and behold it was 100.6 I had no clue I felt lousy BUT didn't really feel feverish anyway nurse leaves Dr comes in asks me about my symptoms told her persistent cough for almost 3 weeks started to feel better end of last week but got VERY much worse this week she looks at nurses notes and said "YOU HAVE A FEVER" I said yes I didn't realize I did but the nurse said infact I do.. the Dr gets out of the room AS FAST AS SHE COULD (under the guides of getting a pulse oxygen monitor) I'm sitting there for like 10 minutes and she returns with gloves, mask and a yellow gown I'm like what the heck is going on.. she says I've got all the symptoms of swine flu and asked me where I have traveled (no where!) who I've been around (no one suspicious).. etc. etc. etc. and I MUST wear my mask at all times now.. fine... she says if it's not flu then it's bronchitis... fine I say.. she says another nurse will come in and do a swab for swine I say fine.. (thinking its like the "swab" for strep) I was VERY WRONG FOLKS!!! another nurse with a surgical cap, yellow gown, gloves and a very hefty looking mask comes in and tells me how sorry she is to have to do this procedure.. "PROCEDURE" I'm getting nervous but still thinking she's going a little over board.. she then explains I'll have to lay flat and she will be putting a tube down my nose and somewhere from my ear canal and throat she will squirt saline solution and then quickly suck it back up and that's what they test for the swine flu.. but WAIT.. I have to be VERY careful and close off my throat when I'm told because if I swollow ANY of the solution the procedure has to be REPEATED!!!

OK I figure how hard can it be, I've had 4 kids for crying out loud I've had epidurals and lots of discusting procedures and this one I don't even have to take my pants off for..

let me tell you folks it was TERRIBLE!!! I cried gasped for air it was painful and felt like I was drowning all in about a 5 second time span.. I think I was hacking up blood (I closed off my throat a little bit to early and the lovely nurse scratched my throat, or what ever cavity she was in) tearing up and nose running all at once.. I couldn't wait to get out of that place but of coarse WITH MY MASK on which only meant I looked MORE Like I had the PlAGUE because the mask now was soaking wet from all my hacking, crying , nose running etc. etc.

I had a message to call the Dr's office when I got home only a few minutes before the office closed.. I was certain they were calling so quickly because it was POSITIVE.. I called them back but got their answering machine left a message to PLEASE CALL ME ASAP.. but what do I do, should I stay home for fear of infecting anyone I come in contact with??.. I think maybe I was a little foolish because I took the boy to practice but kept my cell phone with me.. still no word I took Brad to Dr this morning thinking they'd have to do the same thing with him.. NOPE he has a sinus infection and no fever so I was glad he didn't have to do the test.. I call the nurses station again this morning knowing it's a sat. but they do keep some minimal sat hours and plead my case on the phone message again.. "I REALLY NEED THESE RESULTS TODAY!" a lovely nurse called me I told her I needed my results for H1N1 (swine).. it took her a second but she said "NEGATIVE".. I was happy.. releaved but mostly glad I won't have to deal with health departments, kids going back to school, me working at the school.. it could have been quite a headache~

so all in all my anti-biotics should be kicking in anytime now YEA! and we all should be on the mend in no time!!!
ta ta