my Thank-ti-mony

so what is a Thank-Ti-Mony you ask??? its a bit like a testimony only all about what i'm thankful for...

I needed to let Brad's recent diagnosis sit and simmer for a bit before I could really speak intelligently about it... I still can't say I am 100% comfortable OR even that i'm remotely "happy" about allot of it BUT what can't be denied is how thankful I am for oh so many things...

these are on no particular order

* I am thankful for a PA (physician assistant) who just at a glance decided something didn't "look right" at Brad's EKG during his treadmill stress test.  He told me he doesn't know why but even though the computer didn't detect any issue it just looked "off" to him and so he got out his trusty measuring device (he also showed it to me its a bit more involved than a ruler but basically that's what it was) and sure enough Brad's Q-T interval was slightly long.. he said he made himself measure several times but yep there it was.

* I am thankful for a pediatrician who just decided to be EXTRA cautious and send the boys for cardiac work ups "just to be safe" Football can be linked to this one too because were it not for us moving to the south where it is much hotter than NH and the Dr wanted to be extra careful clearing my boys for the riggers of Football camp etc.

* I am thankful for an AWESOME Aunt!, I re-live the moments when I first got the phone call about the PA's findings, I was in the waiting room of Ben's Oral Surgeon's office un-prepared to take notes and retain anything, I am thankful for my wonderful Aunt who is a MD who is our "go to" for any medical questions.. she had just come off an "all nighter" delivering a baby AND I in my mental fog didn't take into account her being on the WEST coast and ME in  EASTern time zone (thankfully she hadn't gone to sleep yet after the delivery because I think I called her at about 6am her time) she not only was able to walk me through what she knew about Long QT syndrome (she's not a cardiologist) she actually had some experience with a patient of her's that had it!!! she always calms me down I am so thankful for her!!!

*FAMILY needs to get another one my Parents and siblings have really come through it a big way emotionally for me.. My mom cried with me on the phone when we got the final diagnosis and I just can't tell you how much they all mean to me..

*FRIENDS!! I am so blessed! I am still finding my way here in GA but I have felt the out pouring of love, support and friendship from so many here PLUS the support of all of my friends from near and far, phone calls, Facebook messages and e-mails have filled my in-box's and have meant oh so much to me.. I am so blessed and thankful to have so many wonderful people in my life who love me and my family.

* BRAD... this is a last but not least... I  am so thankful for this boy!!! the one who made me a Mom... He had his very typical reaction to new news.. he was silent for about a day and a half.. then he came up with his own plan.. he has dealt with this with so much grace and dignity and I couldn't be prouder!!! we know he is destine for greatness.. (no pressure right??!!!)  we want him to be young and carefree and live with no worries, to be a great person responsible priesthood holder and all around great guy, but we want him to do all those things NOW with just enough caution to ya know, not die.. .. he's well on his way!!! .   does this make him perfect? no way, do we still deal with your standard teenage issues allot of the time, YES!!!  but I am just so proud of how he's handling this whole thing!!!

the long and the short of it is we are COMPLETELY grateful to know what we are facing (although we are still learning a ton so by no means do we know it all, maybe never will!) I try hard not to think of the "what if's" cuz there are lots.. he has pushed his body to its limits before, he's a kid who when he sets his mind to something specifically w/ sports he does it.. track, soccer, football etc. he never did anything half way so I am so grateful for what ever reason this heart issue didn't rear its ugly head.. not to mention the horrible car accident he was in w/ Ben and Hunter a year ago.. ya think his heart rate went up when they were rolling??? ya.. so I try hard not to go there (but obviously I just did!).. we are so blessed.. a good friend of mind said it would just be so not fair to loose 2 kids to heart issues... I completely agree BUT I know its out of my hands.. we can only do what we can do and the rest is just not up to us!!!
my last words are I am so thankful!!! and we are So BLESSED!!!
ta ta